IN SEARCH OF CAREER OR BUSINESS SUCCESS? LOOK HERE:

When seeking the roadmap to success in career and business, you must essentially look in three places:

1. LOOK UP: to God for instructions, the blueprint of what you are meant to do, the direction detailing how you are to go about it, when, where, and for His favour,

2. LOOK INWARD: inside yourself and do a written inventory of your strengths, your skills, your flairs, your talents and the gifts of God in you that have commercial potential, and finally

3. LOOK OUT: for opportunities in the marketplace where the application of your endowments will prove both useful and profitable. Look out for people who can be of use to you as service providers, mentors, strategic partners, amongst others.

These three steps are by no means exhaustive in accomplishing business/career success. But they sure can get you on the path if you do them rightly.

To your success!

Babatunde

WHAT ABOUT ASKING "WHAT DO MEN WANT"?

This is my response to an email in the NIGERIAN CHRISTIAN SINGLES FORUM [http://groups.yahoo.com/group/nigerianxtiansingles/message/4384]. I hope you'll find it helpful.

Hi Guys,

I have followed some of the threads in this House with keen interest, especially the ones that are gender-sensitive as this particular mail. I also read with similar gusto all the arguments thrown back and forth, nodding at some, imbibing some, and discarding some altogether.

However, am quite alarmed to realise that since the inception this Forum some four years ago, virtually all of the gender-sensitive mails we have received herein are more inclined in favour of the women; it is either "How to Treat a Woman", "What Does A Woman Want", “How To Take Care of A Woman”, "How To Love/Show Affection to a Woman", "How to Choose Your Man" etc etc (There are about 888 mails focused on Women, what they want, desire, like, aim, should go for, should choose, among others, on the message board). And the heated debate that usually ensues when there is a slight counter opinion, especially when a brother flaws some of the positions, is always amusing. No doubt, most of our sisters here are very eloquent; they know how to marshal their arguments and defend their folks. Perhaps this is because women are more vocal than men and tend to express themselves more freely in comparison.

However, after reading this last mail by our dear sister, I began to ruminate over a number of things:

1. Aren’t the women being too self-centred by their obsession with what/who they want, and how/where/why/when they want him?
2. Do women take time to find out what the kind of man they desire want and try work on or adjust themselves to give it/them to him the way he wants it/them?
3. In fact, who should do the wanting/desiring the most, is it the man or the woman? It seems that the clamour of the wants/desires of the women have muffled the voice of some men and bludgeoned them into trying to be desirable and acceptable to the woman at the expense of their own distinct identity.

Going by the origin and the order of creation, it is pertinent to note that a woman was created for the man, not the other way round. I guess that requires reiteration, God created a woman because of the man: to help and complement him in his assignments. I hope our sisters would learn from this and not regard it as some chauvinistic positions.

Having established this foreground, the onus then lies on the woman is to find the man whom she was created/meant to complement; while the man has to seek the woman who will be comparable to him in his God-given assignments.

How each party goes about doing this is a discussion for another day. But suffice to say that this primarily hinges on the discovery and fulfilling of one’s PURPOSE in life [You may read my blog post on the phenomenon of purpose here http://macbethology.blogspot.com/2008/06/23-facts-about-your-purpose-in-life.html).

A man that has discovered and is living his purpose in life will be able to identify the woman who will be comparable to him as a wife. Similarly, a woman who knows the calling of God upon her life will instinctively know “the man” when he surfaces in her world. This is beyond such superficial factors, such as physical and/or mental attributes, that are being bandied around in email forwards and other public spaces.

My thinking is that if women (especially those who are yet to marry) can take time to reflect on these and do an honest appraisal/inventory, attracting and identifying the so called Mr. Right will not be an incubus.

Please let’s take our attention off the shadows and focus on the substance.

Shalom!

Babatunde

ADDING VALUE

TIPS FOR MAKING YOUR LIFE COUNTS

- Babatunde Oladele

You are adding value to people when your encounters with them make their eyes shine brightly, make them smile, make them say “thank you,” make them eager to talk to you or desire to be in your company.

On the other hand, you are depleting from people if every day your encounters with them make them frown, make them look or groan, “Oh no, not again!” make them say “I’m sorry” quite often, or they avoid you as much as they can.