Be Free, Manifest and Succeed!

I got this insight after watching a movie entitled “Bubble Boy.”

Humans, when caged by self, dogma or fellow humans cannot be free, neither can they manifest their full potential nor succeed in their endeavours. The very thought of freedom, manifestation, and success suggests an image of outward flow of activities rather than an inward blossom.

However, freedom, manifestation and success do not happen without some degrees of internal and external struggles. These restrictions usually come in form of limitations imposed by the self, others or the environment; and it is to the extent that you overcome them that you will be free, become and succeed.

Therefore, to be free, to manifest or to succeed, here are three keys you may find very helpful:

1.    Go out: you cannot reach your full potential unless you go out of your comfort zone. Have you seen a tortoise moving before? No matter how big or small it is, it cannot move anywhere until it juts its head out of the shell. Humans are no different; there is no progress unless you go out of your shell. You cannot succeed unless you discard the limiting beliefs and self-doubts that have held you down for whatever length of time. To grow, you need to proceed from one level of reasoning or operation to the next. To succeed, you have to go out of the miry of nonchalance and average performance.

2.    Reach out: as you go out of your comfort zone or bland level to pursue your dreams and ideals, you also need to reach out to people and resources that will help you to achieve your objectives along the way. Fortune most often does not favour the taciturn. You need to identify the persons or association that can enhance you as a person as well as enable you to accomplish your aim, and then reach out to them. This is not limited to humans alone; as you are “going out” you will also encounter books, events and other resources that will be helpful to you. Reach out to them, subscribe to them, engage them and assimilate them.

3.    Launch out: to the extent that you have gone out and reached out, you also need to launch out with the idea and initiative you have been nursing, or those that occur to you as you become. A popular maxim holds that “people will not celebrate you for your intentions, but your actions.” To succeed, you need to have a sizable action quotient per day. And the key to doing that is making every hour count. Input substance into your hours and you will have a productive day. Never let an hour pass by without a substantial investment of rigorous thinking or effort with short, medium or long-term yield in it. Even the chunk of time you take to rest or spend with your family constitutes a judicious investment of time that will produce positives. So, don’t think it’s all about working alone.

So, dare the odds and discouragements to launch out and start that business, NGO, product/service line, and whatever it is that you have tucked in the recess of your mind for so long. Don’t fall victim of the paralysis that develops from over-analysis. You will never know all there is to know, have all you need to start, nor have a panoramic view of all there is to see about the idea anyway. So start where you are.

I conclude with a saying I heard some years ago, “instead of waiting for a perfect time, make the present time perfect.”

How You Can Discover Your Potential

¡ By self-examination and reflection

¡ By self-expression in various activities

¡ By being adventurous, and learning from trials and errors

¡ At formal trainings such as workshops, seminars, conferences etc

¡ Through informal interactions with families, friends, colleagues etc

¡ Through divine revelation

¡ By chance and unpremeditated happenings

¡ During a coaching session

Tips For Making Your Life Counts

You are adding value to people when your encounters with them make their eyes shine brightly, make them smile, make them say “thank you,” make them eager to talk to you or desire to be in your company.

On the other hand, you are depleting from people if every day your encounters with them make them frown, make them look or groan, “Oh no, not again!” make them say “I’m sorry” quite often, or they avoid you as much as they can.

The Role of the Woman in the Family

The woman is the pulse of the family. She is the one that dictates the tone and direction of the home. As the manager of the home, the woman wields considerable influence in the ultimate productivity and performance of members of her household in the larger society.

The woman is also the moulder of the character and attitude of members of her household and these inform their level of adaptation into and contributions to the society for good or otherwise. 

The Role of the Woman in the Economy

The woman is the unseen influence behind every successful man in the society. Therefore, as the mother, the wife, the sister, the daughter, or a relative of the men at the corridors of power, the woman is better positioned to influence certain economic policies that will turn out in the best interest of all.

The woman, by virtue of her natural intuitiveness, is more equipped to pursue certain courses that will enhance the economy than the man who is usually more logical in reasoning and action.

The woman performs the dual role of a driver as well as a support system in the economy.

As a driver – the woman facilitates the economic chain through her enterprise in business and in the workplace. The woman also functions as a support system towards the growth and development of the economy.

What About Asking "What Do Men Want"?

This is my response to an email in the NIGERIAN CHRISTIAN SINGLES FORUM [http://groups.yahoo.com/group/nigerianxtiansingles/message/4384]. I hope you'll find it helpful.

Hi Guys,

I have followed some of the threads in this House with keen interest, especially the ones that are gender-sensitive as this particular mail. I also read with similar gusto all the arguments thrown back and forth, nodding at some, imbibing some, and discarding some altogether.

However, am quite alarmed to realise that since the inception this Forum some four years ago, virtually all of the gender-sensitive mails we have received herein are more inclined in favour of the women; it is either "How to Treat a Woman", "What Does A Woman Want", “How To Take Care of A Woman”, "How To Love/Show Affection to a Woman", "How to Choose Your Man" etc etc (There are about 888 mails focused on Women, what they want, desire, like, aim, should go for, should choose, among others, on the message board). And the heated debate that usually ensues when there is a slight counter opinion, especially when a brother flaws some of the positions, is always amusing. No doubt, most of our sisters here are very eloquent; they know how to marshal their arguments and defend their folks. Perhaps this is because women are more vocal than men and tend to express themselves more freely in comparison.

However, after reading this last mail by our dear sister, I began to ruminate over a number of things:

1.   Aren’t the women being too self-centred by their obsession with what/who they want, and how/where/why/when they want him?

2.   Do women take time to find out what the kind of man they desire want and try work on or adjust themselves to give it/them to him the way he wants it/them?

3.   In fact, who should do the wanting/desiring the most, is it the man or the woman? It seems that the clamour of the wants/desires of the women have muffled the voice of some men and bludgeoned them into trying to be desirable and acceptable to the woman at the expense of their own distinct identity.

Going by the origin and the order of creation, it is pertinent to note that a woman was created for the man, not the other way round. I guess that requires reiteration, God created a woman because of the man: to help and complement him in his assignments. I hope our sisters would learn from this and not regard it as some chauvinistic positions.

Having established this foreground, the onus then lies on the woman is to find the man whom she was created/meant to complement; while the man has to seek the woman who will be comparable to him in his God-given assignments.

How each party goes about doing this is a discussion for another day. But suffice to say that this primarily hinges on the discovery and fulfilling of one’s PURPOSE in life [You may read my blog post on the phenomenon of purpose here http://macbethology.blogspot.com/2008/06/23-facts-about-your-purpose-in-life.html).

A man that has discovered and is living his purpose in life will be able to identify the woman who will be comparable to him as a wife. Similarly, a woman who knows the calling of God upon her life will instinctively know “the man” when he surfaces in her world. This is beyond such superficial factors, such as physical and/or mental attributes, that are being bandied around in email forwards and other public spaces.

My thinking is that if women (especially those who are yet to marry) can take time to reflect on these and do an honest appraisal/inventory, attracting and identifying the so called Mr. Right will not be an incubus.

Please let’s take our attention off the shadows and focus on the substance.

Shalom!

Babatunde

Problems, Solutions and Problem-Solvers By Babatunde Oladele

Problems and challenges abound in the world of the living. And we dare not deceive ourselves by hoping that they will all end someday. The day that one ceases to have issues to contend with is the day he bids the world goodbye. To lend credence to this fact, the Bible records in the book of Job 5:7 that man is born to trouble as indubitably as the sparks fly in no other direction but upward.

So having established the fact that problems and challenges abound in the world in different forms and sizes, how can they be solved as they arise? Where does one run to for solution when confronted with challenges?

There are a number of recourses available for men to explore in solving the various challenges of life, such as one’s learning, past experience in handling a similar situation, parents, friends and loved ones, a consultant/counselor, etc. While any or all of these measures can prove to be very helpful, however, the most effective solutions are those given by God, and the best answers to all our questions are found in the presence of God.

I derived this insight from the Holy Bible, the book of Judges Chapter 21. The Israelites were faced with a major problem; preventing the extinction of one of the 12 tribes that formed the pillars of their nation, the tribe of Benjamin.

They had themselves launched a reprisal war on the Benjamites (read Judges Chapters 19 & 20 for details) and killed hundreds of thousands of them in the war, as well as every living thing that were found on their land. Only 600 men of the Benjamites who fled from the battlefront and went to hide in the rock remained, every other person had been killed; old and young, men and women.

And since the Israelites had vowed before God not to give their daughters as wives to the Benjamites, then the tribe faced the risk of total extinction, as there were only 600 survivors left in the whole tribe, and they were all men!

This made the Israelites went to the house of God to seek counsel on what should be done. And there they found the answer to their question. Without speaking through a prophet, God gave them a circumstantial direction on what to do to get wives for the men of Benjamin without having to break their vow.

While the whole congregation of Israel was in the presence of God mourning, weeping, and offering sacrifices, the inhabitants of Jabesh Gilead were not represented. Therefore, in making good their word, the Israelites sent warriors to the city and killed all the children, the men and every married woman in that land. They spared only the virgins whom they brought to the camp and then gave as wives to the men of Benjamin.

Another insight I derived from this new development is that it is those who do not spend time in the presence of God that will be made to pay the price or be used as pawn to execute the solutions that those who spend time in the presence of God come up with. The people of Jabesh Gilead who were found wanting in God’s presence were the ones who forfeited their lives so that their virgins could be given to the Benjamites as wives.

This underscores the need for every one of us to cultivate the habit of spending time in God’s presence, so that we do not become perpetual tools (for the accomplishment of the purpose) of those of who do.