The Fear Factor in Life (Part 2)

ANTIDOTES
Dream: Your dream is one of the most effective antidotes for fear. It can fuel the flames of desire within you until you are willing to confront and overcome your fear. Your dream can help you go where you are afraid to go and do what you are afraid to do. Your dream can provide the spark that will turn your fear to fire.

Action: Action is the only antidote for fear. Act in spite of fear, and the death of fear is certain. When it comes to dealing with fear, you have 3 choices:

1. Try to avoid it altogether. But that means staying away from every known or potential fear-producing person, place thing, or situation.

2. Hope that it will go away. But that’s like hoping for a fairy godmother to rescue you.

3. Face it and overcome it Discover the foundation of fear. Most of the fears we face every day are not based on facts. They are generated by our feelings. For example, a study conducted by the University of Michigan showed the following: 

• 60 percent of our fears are totally unwarranted; they never come to pass 
• 20 percent of our fears are focused on our past, which is completely out of our control 
• 10 percent of our fears are based on things so petty that they make no difference in our lives 
• Of the remaining 10 percent, only 4 to 5 percent could be considered justifiable.

These statistics show that any time or energy you give to fear is totally wasted and counterproductive 95 percent of the time.

The Fear Factor in Life (Part 1)

What is Fear?
The overriding cause of fear is excessive preoccupation with the Self.

Types of Fear: 
1. Fear of Failure
2. Fear of Making Mistakes
3. Fear of rejection
4. Fear of change
5. Fear of confrontation
6. Fear of loss
7. Fear of success!
8. Fear of the Unknown

The biggest barrier that most people have to overcome is fear. It is this fear (and all of its cousins like worry, anxiety, and self-doubt) that paralyses you, and keeps you from succeeding.

EFFECTS OF FEAR
No matter how foolish or humorous another person’s fears may seem to us, our own seem serious. If allowed to control our lives, fear can be a permanent detour on the success journey, stopping us from making any progress.

Fear breeds Inaction Inaction leads to Lack of Experience Lack of Experience fosters Ignorance; and Ignorance breeds Fear - John Maxwell

OTHER EFFECTS OF FEAR

• Procrastination
• Sluggishness
• Not taking Initiative
• Laziness & Indecision
• Timidity
• Introversion
• Reticence (Uncommunicative)
• Inactivity 

Problems, Solutions and Problem-Solvers

Problems and challenges abound in the world of the living. And we dare not deceive ourselves by hoping that they will all end someday. The day that one ceases to have issues to contend with is the day he bids the world goodbye. To lend credence to this fact, the Bible records in the book of Job 5:7 that man is born to trouble as indubitably as the sparks fly in no other direction but upward.

So having established the fact that problems and challenges abound in the world in different forms and sizes, how can they be solved as they arise? Where does one run to for solution when confronted with challenges?

There are a number of recourses available for men to explore in solving the various challenges of life, such as one’s learning, past experience in handling a similar situation, parents, friends and loved ones, a consultant/counselor, etc. While any or all of these measures can prove to be very helpful, however, the most effective solutions are those given by God, and the best answers to all our questions are found in the presence of God.

I derived this insight from the Holy Bible, the book of Judges Chapter 21. The Israelites were faced with a major problem; preventing the extinction of one of the 12 tribes that formed the pillars of their nation, the tribe of Benjamin.

They had themselves launched a reprisal war on the Benjamites (read Judges Chapters 19 & 20 for details) and killed hundreds of thousands of them in the war, as well as every living thing that were found on their land. Only 600 men of the Benjamites who fled from the battlefront and went to hide in the rock remained, every other person had been killed; old and young, men and women.

And since the Israelites had vowed before God not to give their daughters as wives to the Benjamites, then the tribe faced the risk of total extinction, as there were only 600 survivors left in the whole tribe, and they were all men!

This made the Israelites went to the house of God to seek counsel on what should be done. And there they found the answer to their question. Without speaking through a prophet, God gave them a circumstantial direction on what to do to get wives for the men of Benjamin without having to break their vow.

While the whole congregation of Israel was in the presence of God mourning, weeping, and offering sacrifices, the inhabitants of Jabesh Gilead were not represented. Therefore, in making good their word, the Israelites sent warriors to the city and killed all the children, the men and every married woman in that land. They spared only the virgins whom they brought to the camp and then gave as wives to the men of Benjamin.

Another insight I derived from this new development is that it is those who do not spend time in the presence of God that will be made to pay the price or be used as pawn to execute the solutions that those who spend time in the presence of God come up with. The people of Jabesh Gilead who were found wanting in God’s presence were the ones who forfeited their lives so that their virgins could be given to the Benjamites as wives.

This underscores the need for every one of us to cultivate the habit of spending time in God’s presence, so that we do not become perpetual tools (for the accomplishment of the purpose) of those of who do.

13 Tips on How to be a Star Performer (Part 5) By Babatunde Oladele

12. Self-discipline

All the highlighted pointers that make a star performer are a matter of discipline.After you have taken note of all the points, if you are not disciplined enough to put them into practice, they will all filter away. Self-discipline is what gets you started and keeps you going even when you don’t feel like it. In fact, one constant principle from all the books I have read on success is self-discipline.

Star performers are self-disciplined people, they don’t take nonsense from themselves, and they don’t take it from people either. They are harder on themselves than they are on people. They are driven by results; they don’t like stories and excuses. There can be a million and one reasons why things cannot or should not be done. Star performers only look for one reason why it should be done and they go ahead to do it despite the odds.

The workplace is about results and not reasons why things should not or cannot be done. People desire to associate with success, but it is not easy to be successful; there is no overnight success, the person who becomes successful has been paying prices that others have not been paying. That is why you just see him soaring above others, it is not by magic. Yes, God’s favour is key; and God will indeed favour you, as He has promised to bless the work of your hands. But if your hand is not doing much, what will be available for God to bless? It’s what you are doing that God blesses, He will not bless what has not been done.

We have passed that stage when the earth was void and it was without form, we are now in the realm of tangibles. He says,‘I will bless the works of your hands’, but if your hand is not doing something and He blesses nothing; nothing will start to multiply into more nothing.

Achievements come by self-discipline.You know we don’t like to be disciplined and we don’t like to discipline ourselves, but we have to be hard on ourselves to make any impact. Internet is a major distraction these days; for us to be focused, we have to limit our use of the internet. For the purpose of clarification, the internet can be a great tool for success, but it depends on what you are doing there. You have to be self-disciplined in your usage and activities on the internet. Star performers are disciplined people.

You usually know disciplined people from the way they talk and conduct themselves. While everyone can give excuses, it is the person that produces results that is celebrated, not story tellers. How many excuse-makers do you know that are successful? Nobody claps for what you plan or intend to do. You only get applauded for what you have done, and it takes discipline to get difficult things done because you have to take tough decisions and be rigorous in your thinking. It is not even easy to think through a process, it takes discipline.

13. The God Factor

Star performers know the place of God. You remember the story of Herod in the Bible, he talked and people started hailing him as God; then, suddenly, he was snuffed out. You have to know your source; star performers know their sources. They know where they recharge their batteries and receive inspiration. Where do you unwind, where do you get inspiration from? What makes you gel? These can be answered by knowing yourself (discussed in the first tip) and knowing your source.

Life is full of ups and downs; so there are many instances when both productive and idle people will experience highsor lows. It is the way each individual responds to these varying situations in life that usually separates them. When productive people face issues that are beyond them, they know where to turn because they know they must deliver results. The loafers, on the other hand, will merely cave in and turn back saying it is difficult because they do not think that they have to deliver. So, even as the loafer also has a source, he/she doesn’t draw much from there because it doesn’t seem to matter.

Star performers know their source and they draw strength and inspiration from there to carry on because they are committed to optimising their performance.

13 Tips on How to be a Star Performer (Part 4) By Babatunde Oladele

9. Focus

After you set your priorities and you are able to manage time, you have to be able to focus on what you are doing. You have to learn the art of focusing. As simple as it sounds, it is one of the most difficult things to do. It is not easy maintaining a laser focus on what you are doing and not be distracted.

There are psychological noises everywhere, even in your own thoughts there will be stuff demanding your attention. But you must have the ability to sieve through the myriad of things and focus on what needs to be done at any point in time. That is a major habit of star performers, they know how to focus; they know how to sieve through the muddled thoughts, they know what they want and they go after it, not minding what is going on within, around, below or above them. They just focus on what they have to do; they are not easily distracted or carried away.

You have to maintain focus, it is key to star performance. People usually get swept away by emotions and situations and then leave what they are doing or supposed to do to mind whatnot. Star performers do not fall prey to such trifles.

10. Manage people and your environment

You have to be able to manage people and your environment. For instance, maybe Mr A is busy working and then Mr B sees something on the internet and says,‘Hey, Mr A see this.’ In order to be polite, Mr A can check and then go back to what he is doing immediately. But if he is not someone who is committed to productivity, he can abandon what he is doing and start to ‘hoo-hah’ with Mr B such that both of them put their official tasks aside and become engaged in exchanging comments about a news or social media post.

You have to manage the people around you so you can be productive. People are their own enemies, if you leave what you are doing and then start to mind what you are not supposed to do, you cannot be productive. You have to manage people; you have to learn to say,‘No’ or promise to check it later, but not now because you need to do certain things at this time.

You have to be able to manage the people around you:your colleagues, your family members, your friends, associates, Facebook contacts, etc. If someone is chatting with me online and they do not say what they want to say between the first, two, three chats, I would not answer the person again. There must be a reason you want to engage me, I don’t have much time for online chats except there is something important to discuss.

You need to manage your environment too, there are some environments that aid productivity, and there are some that inhibit it. You have to position yourself in an environment that aids productivity, for example the way you organise your system, table and workspace. You will see some desktops littered with all manners of files, folders and applications; experts say you don’t get productive in a cluttered environment. So there is a way you arrange your system and workspace that aids productivity because performance is also environment-driven.

11. Review your work

Top performers have reviews ingrained in their system. If you have done something you should look at it again and ask yourself questions: Is this the best I can come up with or can I do better? They review their day; how has my day been, how have I fared? At home, how have I fared? Have I bonded with my family members? Have I bonded with my wife, husband, children? Review your work, your day, your professional life, your family life, your spiritual life so you can know if you are on track or off track.

The holy book counsels that you examine yourself to see if you are still in the faith. A popular saying goes that ‘an unexamined life is not worth living.’ A life that is not being assessed is not worth living. You have to be able to review your own performance before you are assessed by your superiors. You should also review your day, week, month, quarter and year. This helps you to know what you have accomplished so that you can report it and get the confidence boost to do more. It also helps you to know what is outstanding so you can pursue it. Star performers review their work, output, day, conduct and actions.

13 Tips on How to be a Star Performer (Part 4)

9. Focus

After you set your priorities and you are able to manage time, you have to be able to focus on what you are doing. You have to learn the art of focusing. As simple as it sounds, it is one of the most difficult things to do. It is not easy maintaining a laser focus on what you are doing and not be distracted.

There are psychological noises everywhere, even in your own thoughts there will be stuff demanding your attention. But you must have the ability to sieve through the myriad of things and focus on what needs to be done at any point in time. That is a major habit of star performers, they know how to focus; they know how to sieve through the muddled thoughts, they know what they want and they go after it, not minding what is going on within, around, below or above them. They just focus on what they have to do; they are not easily distracted or carried away.

You have to maintain focus, it is key to star performance. People usually get swept away by emotions and situations and then leave what they are doing or supposed to do to mind whatnot. Star performers do not fall prey to such trifles.

10. Manage people and your environment

You have to be able to manage people and your environment. For instance, maybe Mr A is busy working and then Mr B sees something on the internet and says,‘Hey, Mr A see this.’ In order to be polite, Mr A can check and then go back to what he is doing immediately. But if he is not someone who is committed to productivity, he can abandon what he is doing and start to ‘hoo-hah’ with Mr B such that both of them put their official tasks aside and become engaged in exchanging comments about a news or social media post.

You have to manage the people around you so you can be productive. People are their own enemies, if you leave what you are doing and then start to mind what you are not supposed to do, you cannot be productive. You have to manage people; you have to learn to say,‘No’ or promise to check it later, but not now because you need to do certain things at this time.

You have to be able to manage the people around you:your colleagues, your family members, your friends, associates, Facebook contacts, etc. If someone is chatting with me online and they do not say what they want to say between the first, two, three chats, I would not answer the person again. There must be a reason you want to engage me, I don’t have much time for online chats except there is something important to discuss.

You need to manage your environment too, there are some environments that aid productivity, and there are some that inhibit it. You have to position yourself in an environment that aids productivity, for example the way you organise your system, table and workspace. You will see some desktops littered with all manners of files, folders and applications; experts say you don’t get productive in a cluttered environment. So there is a way you arrange your system and workspace that aids productivity because performance is also environment-driven.

11. Review your work

Top performers have reviews ingrained in their system. If you have done something you should look at it again and ask yourself questions: Is this the best I can come up with or can I do better? They review their day; how has my day been, how have I fared? At home, how have I fared? Have I bonded with my family members? Have I bonded with my wife, husband, children? Review your work, your day, your professional life, your family life, your spiritual life so you can know if you are on track or off track.

The holy book counsels that you examine yourself to see if you are still in the faith. A popular saying goes that ‘an unexamined life is not worth living.’ A life that is not being assessed is not worth living. You have to be able to review your own performance before you are assessed by your superiors. You should also review your day, week, month, quarter and year. This helps you to know what you have accomplished so that you can report it and get the confidence boost to do more. It also helps you to know what is outstanding so you can pursue it. Star performers review their work, output, day, conduct and actions.

12. Self-discipline

All the highlighted pointers that make a star performer are a matter of discipline.After you have taken note of all the points, if you are not disciplined enough to put them into practice, they will all filter away. Self-discipline is what gets you started and keeps you going even when you don’t feel like it. In fact, one constant principle from all the books I have read on success is self-discipline.

Star performers are self-disciplined people, they don’t take nonsense from themselves, and they don’t take it from people either. They are harder on themselves than they are on people. They are driven by results; they don’t like stories and excuses. There can be a million and one reasons why things cannot or should not be done. Star performers only look for one reason why it should be done and they go ahead to do it despite the odds.

The workplace is about results and not reasons why things should not or cannot be done. People desire to associate with success, but it is not easy to be successful; there is no overnight success, the person who becomes successful has been paying prices that others have not been paying. That is why you just see him soaring above others, it is not by magic. Yes, God’s favour is key; and God will indeed favour you, as He has promised to bless the work of your hands. But if your hand is not doing much, what will be available for God to bless? It’s what you are doing that God blesses, He will not bless what has not been done.

We have passed that stage when the earth was void and it was without form, we are now in the realm of tangibles. He says,‘I will bless the works of your hands’, but if your hand is not doing something and He blesses nothing; nothing will start to multiply into more nothing.

Achievements come by self-discipline.You know we don’t like to be disciplined and we don’t like to discipline ourselves, but we have to be hard on ourselves to make any impact. Internet is a major distraction these days; for us to be focused, we have to limit our use of the internet. For the purpose of clarification, the internet can be a great tool for success, but it depends on what you are doing there. You have to be self-disciplined in your usage and activities on the internet. Star performers are disciplined people.

You usually know disciplined people from the way they talk and conduct themselves. While everyone can give excuses, it is the person that produces results that is celebrated, not story tellers. How many excuse-makers do you know that are successful? Nobody claps for what you plan or intend to do. You only get applauded for what you have done, and it takes discipline to get difficult things done because you have to take tough decisions and be rigorous in your thinking. It is not even easy to think through a process, it takes discipline.

13. The God Factor

Star performers know the place of God. You remember the story of Herod in the Bible, he talked and people started hailing him as God; then, suddenly, he was snuffed out. You have to know your source; star performers know their sources. They know where they recharge their batteries and receive inspiration. Where do you unwind, where do you get inspiration from? What makes you gel? These can be answered by knowing yourself (discussed in the first tip) and knowing your source.

Life is full of ups and downs; so there are many instances when both productive and idle people will experience highsor lows. It is the way each individual responds to these varying situations in life that usually separates them. When productive people face issues that are beyond them, they know where to turn because they know they must deliver results. The loafers, on the other hand, will merely cave in and turn back saying it is difficult because they do not think that they have to deliver. So, even as the loafer also has a source, he/she doesn’t draw much from there because it doesn’t seem to matter.

Star performers know their source and they draw strength and inspiration from there to carry on because they are committed to optimising their performance.

13 Tips on How to be a Star Performer (Part 3)

6. Count the cost

What will it take me to accomplish these goals? What will it take me to cover this scope?What will it take me to meet the expectations or requirements that were delivered to me? What are the things I need to do to achieve all these? Asking such questions is the hallmark of a wise person. Jesus Christ says only a wise man would count the cost before undertaking to build a structure: how many blocks do I need to do this? What are the costs I need to count?

Every form of greatness requires something from the great; and there is always a price to pay for any measure of success. There is no overnight success; if you see an overnight success, the person has not been sleeping. You usually need to give up something in order to gain something; that is the way life operates. You have to give up a lesser thing to gain a greater thing. You have to know the price to pay to become a star performer in any area of life. We always use Daddy G.O. (Pastor E.A. Adeboye of Redeemed Christian Church of God) as a reference point, being the most prominent clergy in Nigeria in terms of popularity and following. However, do you know the price he is paying for that kind of eminence? How many days he goes fasting and praying, how many hours he spends on his knees? It took something for him to get to that point. If he did not pay those prices, he probably would not be where he is.

Yes, the grace of God is there for him; but Apostle Paul makes a very powerful statement that inasmuch as there were many apostles in his time, and he being the least of them, but he endeavoured to do more than all his contemporaries. He then enumerates those things he did that put him in a good stead. Why wouldn’t he be attributed to have written one-third of the Bible since he paid the price? What are the costs that should be counted for you to achieve the goals and objectives you have set for yourself and become a star performer? The price is not always easy, but it is those who count the costs and pay the price that are celebrated.

7. Set your priorities

What are your priorities? You have been told what you are supposed to do, you know how far you are supposed to go, you know what scope you are supposed to cover, and you know what will be used to assess your performance. Armed with the knowledge above, you also need to know which one to do first of all the things you are supposed to do; which one should come second, which one should come third, which one should be last. You have to set priorities; you have to know the order you are supposed to do things. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 8:5-6 (NIV) ‘there is a time and procedure for every matter but a man’s misery weigh heavily on him.’ There is always a procedure for everything we do, even such mundane things as sitting or walking have a procedure. There is a procedure for working, writing, listening, speaking, parenting, husbanding, wife-ing; everything has a procedure.

However, the Bible says only the wise in heart will know the proper time and procedure. There is a proper time and procedure for everything you have to do and that is why you have to set priorities; what do you do at point A, what do you do at B, what do you do at point C, until you get to point Z? You have to set priorities every day to know what you do first.

Life is a school; it teaches us a lot of things, only if we pay careful attention to the lessons. How many of us just put on our dress and head to work when we wake up in the morning? No, we probably have to first take care of ourselves: brush our teeth, shower, apply cosmetics, etc. The first thing is not to don the clothes and hit the road; there are certain preliminary things to be done before you get to the stage of wearing clothes. That is a lesson in procedure. Life teaches us a lot of lessons on a daily basis; we only need to be attentive to them.

There are things you have to do first so you can perform and be productive. If you put the least important thing first, you won’t get the most important things done. So you have to set priorities, you have to know the order of what you are meant to do. Now you know yourself, the metrics, the coverage, you also need to know how do to do them: which one is first, which is second, the third etc. Star performers set priorities.

8. Manage your time

There is time and season for everything. But you have to ascertain the time and then manage yourself within it. Time management is one of the things God will not do for anyone. That is why the Bible urges us to redeem the time because the days are evil.

Time management is the chief of all skills, because if you can manage time, then you can manage money. If you can’t manage time, you can’t manage money, because time is money. If you can manage money, you can manage people. That is the way I see it, because people naturally flock after money and they would do whatever anyone who helps them to increase or make more money tells them to do.

If you manage time well, you can manage money effectively. A reason why people have poor financial situation is because they do not manage their time well. Time is intangible, we don’t see it; we only see what the hands of the clock are saying. But we can see money, smell and touch it. However, if you can manage the intangible time, then you can manage the tangibles effectively. You were given many assignments to carry out, but you can idle within time and not achieve all you were asked to do by just loafing; that is a horrible thing to do because time is meant to be turned over into results on a daily basis.

I used to have a Nokia phone that I set to beep every hour so I could reflect on what I had achieved within the hour that just passed. If I had used the hour well, I would smile. I was in paid employment then, and I was not even reporting to my principal about most of what I had done. But If I had not done something worthwhile within the hour, I would feel bad and tell myself, ‘You’ve got to make the next hour count.’ Time management is very important and star performers are strict time managers.